That was a water buffalo you idiot!!

I can commend the efforts.  It really doesn't matter if it works or not.  What matters is that you tried.  Bullshit.  It does matter.  Does anyone remember Billy Coconut from the 1400's whose failed attempt at prose resulted in Humlet?  Does anyone care that Johnny Wisass penned Moby Dike, the story of a fisherman trying to overcome a large dam, long before Herman Melville was even alive.  I will not reward mediocrity.  I will not justify the bailout.  Write or be damned.  Enar would expect no less.  And the poor sap who initiated this mostly failed attempt?  The guy who called at midnight drunk off wine coolers and Boone's Farm who caught inspiration reading Mad Magazine in the john in between bouts of diarrhea and coarse vomit?  He's nowhere to be found.  (Said in the whining 6 year old voice of a girl who wants candy and won't get it)....He's got reviews to write and evaluations to do.  His sprinkler is broken and toilet is clogged.  His IBS has returned and his tonsils need to be removed.  His eyes are too green, his skin is too light, his tatoo's are fading, his hair needs cutting, his toe nails need clipping, his eyebrows need combing, his pubic hair needs to be waxed, his genitals need a good cleansing, and he could use an overall bleeding.  His house is too cold, his underwear too warm, his sperm count is low, he's losing his eyelashes, and he has an unnatural desire to own 12 cardigan sweaters.  His skin is dry, his clothes have static cling, and his Hannah Montana video is lost.  Oh yeah and Neytiri is pretty hot.